The Sophister (Fallacy, or The Troubles of Great Hermenia) · chunk 17 of 32
Zouche, Richard · published 1639 · first performed or written 1614 [c.1614-1620] (Annals) comedy unassigned nearest T23 Husbands, wives and jealousy · 480 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T23: wife, husband, cuckold, jealousy, woman, jealous, mistress, love, house, honest.
I do believe you, and rely on you; And therefore know, that not an hour since I by a sly devised subtlety, Have luckily surprised the Lady Truth, With her two famous Daughters; now in doubt How I might best captive their constant thoughts, I fain would hear your resolutions. Were it my care I would enforce them straight. They should not eat, nor drink, nor rest on minute. Nay, I would torture, and torment them all, Till they did yield submissly to my pleasure. I think such means at first too violent, I'll try how glozing words, and kind entreaties Can work upon them: You know not the force Of well conveyed dissimulation, Therefore go you, and through Parrhesia, Proclaim my lawful just succession. I will my noble Lord. And do you hear? To make my name more gracious, more beloved, I will no longer be called Fallacy: Stile me great Sophime. You Contradiction, Let Definition and Division know What is our pleasure to be done with them. I ne'er did any thing more willingly. I myself, My project will pursue immediately; methinks my hopes assure me. Now damned slaves, Disloyal and unfaithful miscreants, Think ye that I will trust your villainies? No: these distempered, quarrelling, fighting fellows. Most not be conscious to our Policies, They will rip open one another's breast, And prostitute their hearts to vulgar view: Therefore the next thing that I will contrive, Shall be their ruin: Dead dogs cannot bite: That done, I fear not Fortune's envious spite. IF I go any farther let me be frozen to death, like Sir Hugh Willowby, or be made Cuckold with the tedious Traveller Ulysses: It were impossible to see all, yet I should see more than I should be able to relate, and like monsieur, or Sir Iohn Mandovill, relate more than any would believe. I care not how these women take it. The Tailor in Plutarch would as soon make a habit for the Moon, as any man a Description of them, and so long would it fit them. I think they consist of Materia prima, they are capable of all forms and impressions, but constant to none: And it is no great matter to describe them you see them curiously painted everywhere. And who would e'er thought these Scholars should have so much troubled me: I supposing they had been so like in their humours, as they are agreeable in their formalities, thought first to have drawn the Characters of some of them, but by what time I had observed some Captitious Critics, Fantastic Humorists, and malicious Satirists, I found it no less impossible than perilous to deal with that kind, and indeed am quite dismayed from going any farther in this enterprise. Well, I will deliver back to the Lords their Commission, and rather sue for a Protection. But who comes here, Distinction?
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
I doe beleeve you, and relye on you; And therefore know, that not an houre since I by a sly devised subtlety, Have luckily surpriz'd the Lady Truth, With her two famous Daughters; now in doubt How I might best captive their constant thoughts, I faine would heare your resolutions. Were it my care I would enforce them straight. They should not eate, nor drinke, nor rest on minute. Nay, I would torture, and torment them all, Till they did yeeld submissely to my pleasure. I thinke such meanes at first too violent, I'le try how glozing words, and kind intreaties Can worke upon them: You know not the force Of well convey'd dissimulation, Therefore goe you, and through Parrhesia, Proclaime my lawfull just succession. I will my noble Lord. And doe you heare? To make my name more gracious, more belov'd, I will no longer be call'd Fallacy: Stile me great Sophime. You Contradiction, Let Definition and Division know What is our pleasure to be done with them. I ne're did any thing more willingly. I my selfe, My projct will pursue immediately; Mee thinkes my hopes assure me. Now damn'd slaves, Disloyall and unfaithfull miscreants, Thinke yee that I will trust your villanies? No: these distemper'd, quarrelling, fighting fellow. Most not be conscious to our Policies, They will rip open one auothers breast, And prostitute their hearts to vulgar view: Therefore the next thing that I wil contrive, Shall be their ruine: Dead dogges cannot bite: That done, I feare not Fortunes envious spight. IF I goe any farther let me be frozen to death, like Sir Hugh Willowby, or be made Cuckoid with the tedious Traveller Ulysses: It were impossible to see all, yet I should see more than I should be able to relate, and like Munsier, or Sir Iohn Mandovill, relate more than any would beleeve. I care not how these women take it. The Tailor in Plutarch would as soone make a habit for the Moone, as any man a Description of them, and so long would it fit them. I thinke they consist of Materia prima, they are capable of all formes and impressions, but constant to none: And it is no great matter to describe them you see them curiously painted every where. And who would e're thought these Schollers should have so much troubled me: I supposing they had beene so like in their humours, as they are agreeable in their formalities, thought first to have drawne the Characters of some of them, but by what time I had observed some Captitious Criticks, Phantasticke Humorists, and malicious Satyrists, I found it no lesse impossible than perilons to deale with that kinde, and indeed am quite dismaid from going any farther in this enterprize. Well, I will deliver backe to the Lords their Commission, and rather sue for a Protection. But who comes here, Distinction?