Whetstone, George · published 1578 · first performed or written 1578 [1576-1579] (Annals) comedy · Unacted unassigned nearest T23 Husbands, wives and jealousy · 538 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T23: wife, husband, cuckold, jealousy, woman, jealous, mistress, love, house, honest.
Happy is the man, that enjoys the love of such a wife, I do protest, her modest words, hath wrought in me a maze. Though she be far, she is not deackt, with garish shows for gaze, Her beauty lures, her looks cut off, fond suits with chaste disdain. O God I feel a sudden change, that doth my freedom chain. What didst thou say? fie Promos fie: of her avoid the thought, And so I will, my other cares will cure what love hath wrought, Come away. My trusty friends about your business strait, With simple shows, your subtle meanings bait: Promote all faults, up into my office, Then turn me loose, the offenders to fleece. Tush, to find law breakers let me alone, I have eyes, will look into a millstone. God a mercy Gripax. And I am so subtle sighted I trow, As I the very thoughts of men do know: I faith Rapax, what thought thy wife when she, To lie with the priest, by night stole from thee? Mary she knew, you and I were at square, And lest we fell to blows, she did prepare. To arm my head, to match thy horned brow. Go and a knave with thee. I stay for you: No harm is done, here is but blow for blue, Birds of a feather, best fly together, Then like partners, about your market go, Marrows adieu, God sent you fair wether. Far you well, for us take no care, With us this broad speech seldom breedeth square. Mary sir, welfare an office, what some ever it be, The very countenance, is great, though slender be the see, I thank my good Lord Promos now, I am an officer made, In sooth more by hap then desert, in secret be it said: Not force for that, each shift for one, for Phallax will do so, Well far a head can take his time nay watch for time I trow. I smile to think of my fell▪ wes; how some brave it, some weight, And think reward, there service just, with offered shifts will bayght When they (poor souls) in troth do fall a mile upon account, For flattery and fervent plesing, are means to make men mount: I speak on proof, Lord Promos, I have pleased many a day, Yet am I neither learned, true, nor honest any way. What skills for that, by wit or wile, I have an office got, By force whereof every licence, warrant, patent, passport, Leace, fine, fee, et cetera, pas and repas, through Phallax hands, Disorored persons bribe me well, to escape from justice bands, And wealthy churls for to promote, I now have set a work, Such hungry lads, as soon will smell, where statute breakers lurk, And if they come, within our Gripe, we mean to stripe them so, As (if they scape from open shame) their bags with us shall go. And trust me this, we officers, of this mild mould are wrought, Agree with us, and sure your shame by us shall not be sought: But soft a while, I see my Lord what makes him lower so▪ I will intrude into his sight, perhaps his grief to know.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Happie is the man, that inioyes the loue of ſuch a wife, I do proteſt, hir modeſt wordes, hath wrought in me a maze. Though ſhe be farre, ſhe is not deackt, with gariſh ſhewes for gaze, Hir bewtie lures, hir lookes cut off, fond ſutes with chaſt diſdain. O God I feele a ſodaine change, that doth my fréedome chayne. What didſt thou ſay? fie Promos fie: of hir auoide the thought, And ſo I will, my other cares wyll cure what loue hath wrought, Come awaye. My truſty friendes about your buſineſſe ſtraight, With ſymple ſhowes, your ſubtile meanings bayte: Promote all faults, vp into my office, Then turne me loſe, the offenders to fleece. Tuſh, to finde lawe breakers let me alone, I haue eyes, will looke into a Mylſtone. God a mercy Gripax. And I am ſo ſubtyll ſighted I trowe, As I the very thoughts of men doo know: I fayth Rapax, what thought thy wife when ſhe, To lye with the preeſt, by night ſtole from thee? Marry ſhe knew, you and I were at ſquare, And leaſt we fell to blowes, ſhe did prepare. To arme my head, to match thy horned browe. Goe and a knaue with thée. I ſtay for you: No harme is done, here is but blow for blew, Byrds of a fether, beſt flye together, Then like partners, about your market goe, Marrowes adew, God ſent you fayre wether. Fare you well, for vs take no care, With vs this brode ſpéeche ſildome breedeth ſquare. Marry ſyr, welfare an office, what ſome euer it be, The very countenaunce, is great, though ſlender be the ſée, I thanke my good Lord Promos now, I am an officer made, In ſooth more by hap then deſart, in ſecret be it ſayde: No force for that, each ſhyft for one, for Phallax will doo ſo, Well fare a head can take his tyme nay watch for time I trow. I ſmyle to thinke of my fell▪ wes; how ſome braue it, ſome waight, And thinke reward, there ſeruice iuſt, with offred ſhifts wyl bayght When they (poore ſoules) in troth do falle a myle vpon account, For flattery and feruent pleſing, are meanes to make men mount: I ſpeake on proofe, Lord Promos, I haue pleaſed many a day, Yet am I neither learned, true, nor honeſt any way. What ſkyls for that, by wit or wyle, I haue an office got, By force wherof euery lycence, warrant, pattent, paſport, Leace, fyne, fee, et cetera, pas and repas, through Phallax hands, Diſorored perſons brybe me wel, to eſcape from Iuſtice bands, And welthy churles for to promote, I now haue ſet a worke, Such hungry lads, as ſoone will ſmell, where ſtatute breakers lurk, And if they come, within our Grype, we meane to ſtripe them ſo, As (if they ſcape from open ſhame) their bagges with vs ſhall goe. And truſt me this, we officers, of this mylde mould are wrought, Agrée with vs, and ſure your ſhame by vs ſhal not be ſought: But ſoft a whyle, I ſee my Lord what makes him lowre ſo▪ I wyll intrude into his ſight, perhaps his greefe to know.