Anonymous · published 1606 · first performed or written 1605 [1603-1606] (Annals) history; satire · Queen Anne's Men unassigned nearest T6 Money, debt and credit · 501 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T6: money, master, pound, law, lawyer, chain, gentleman, gold, pay, pray.
My Lord, 'tis past my reach, 'tis you must do it, Or't must be left undone. What deeds of note is he else famous for? My Lord I'll tell you. His Barns are full, and when the Cormorants And wealthy Farmers hoard up all the grain, He empties all his Garners to the poor Under the stretched prize that the Market yields, Nobody racks no rents, doth not oppress His tenants with extortions. When the King Knighted the lusty gallants of the Land, Nobody then made dainty to be knighted, And indeed kept him in his known estate. The slaves ambitious; and his life I hate. How shall we bring his name in public scandal? Thus it shall be, use my direction. In Court and country I am Somebody, And therefore apt and fit to be employed: Go thou in secret being a subtle knave. And sow seditious slanders through the Land, Oppress the poor, suppress the fatherless, Deny the widows food, the starved relief, And when the wretches shall complain their wrongs, Being called in question, swear 'twas Nobody, Rack rends, raise prizes, Buy up the best and choice commodities At the best hand, then keep them till their prizes Be lifted to their height, and double rate, And when the raisers of this dearth are sought Though Somebody do this, protest and swear 'twas Nobody fore judge and Magistrate: Bring scandals on the rich, raise mutinous lies Upon the state, and rumours in the Court, Backbite and sow dissension amongst friends, Quarrels 'mongst neighbours, & debate 'mongst strangers, Set man and wife at odds, kindred at strife, And when it comes in question, to clear us, Let every one protest and swear for one, And so the blame will fall on Nobody. About it then, if these things well succeed, You shall prevail, and we applaud your speed. See where he comes, I will withdraw and see, The event and fortunes of our last policy. Come on mine own servant, some news, some news, what report have I in the country? how am I talked on in the City, and what fame bear I in the Court? Oh Master you are half hanged. Hanged, why man? Because you have an ill name: a man had as good almost serve no Master as serve you, I was carried afore the Constable but yesterday, and they took me up for a stravagant; they asked me whom I served, I told them Nobody, they presently drew me to the post, and there gave me the law of arms. The law of arms. ay, as much law as their arms were able to lay on, they tickled my Collifodium, I rid post for a quarter of an hour, with switch though not with spur. Sure Somebody was the cause of all. I'll be sworn of that, Somebody tickled me a heat, and that I felt, but Master, why do you go thus out of fashion; you are even a very hoddy-doddy, all breech,
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
My Lord, tis past my reach, tis you must doe it, Or't must be left vndone. What deedes of note is he els famous for? My Lord Ile tell you. His Barnes are full, and when the Cormorants And welthy Farmers hoord vp all the graine, He empties all his Garners to the poore Vnder the stretcht prise that the Market yeelds, Nobody racks no rents, doth not oppresse His tenants with extortions. When the King Knighted the lustie gallants of the Land, Nobody then made daintie to be knighted, And indeede kept him in his knowne estate. The slaues ambitious▪ and his life I hate. How shall we bring his name in publick scandall? Thus it shall be, vse my direction. In Court and country I am Sombody, And therefore apt and fit to be employed: Goe thou in secrete beeing a subtile knaue. And sowe seditious slaunders through the Land, Oppresse the poore, suppresse the fatherlesse, Deny the widdowes foode, the staru'd releefe, And when the wretches shall complaine their wrongs, Beeing cald in question, sweare twas Nobody, Racke rents, raise prises, Buy vp the best and choise commodities At the best hand, then keepe them till their prises Be lifted to their height, and double rate, And when the raisers of this dearth are sought Though Sombody doe this, protest and sweare Twas Nobody fore Iudge and Magistrate: Bring scandalls on the rich, raise mutinous lyes Vpon the state, and rumors in the Court, Backbite and sow dissention amongst freends, Quarrels mongst neighbors, & debate mongst strangers, Set man and wife at ods, kindred at strife, And when it comes in question, to cleere vs, Let euery one protest and sweare for one, And so the blame will fall on Nobody. About it then, if these things well succeede, You shall preuaile, and we applaude your speede. See where he comes, I will withdraw and see, The euent and fortunes of our last pollicie. Come on myne owne seruaunt, some newes, some newes, what report haue I in the country? how am I talkt on in the Citty, and what fame beare I in the Court? Oh Maister you are halfe hangd. Hangd, why man? Because you haue an ill name: a man had as good almost serue no Maister as serue you, I was carried afore the Constable but yesterday, and they tooke mee vp for a strauagant; they askt mee whom I serued, I told them Nobody, they presently drew mee to the post, and there gaue me the law of armes. The law of armes. Ey, as much lawe as their armes were able to lay on, they tickled my Collifodium, I rid post for a quarter of an houre, with switch though not with spurre. Sure Sombody was the cause of all. Ile be sworne of that, Sombody tickled me a heate, and that I felt, but Maister, why doe you goe thus out of fashion; you are euen a very hoddy doddy, all breech,