Middleton, Thomas · published 1607 · first performed or written 1604 [1603-1604] (Annals) comedy · Children of Paul's (second) · before the Court T23 Husbands, wives and jealousy typicality 0.76 · 492 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of T23: wife, husband, cuckold, jealousy, woman, jealous, mistress, love, house, honest.
I love to avoid strife, Not many months Phoenix shall keep his life. So, his way is in, he knows it, We must not be uncourteous to a Lord, Warn him our house 'twere wild: his presence is an honour, if he lie with our wives, 'tis for our credit, we shall be the better trusted, 'tis a sign we shall live i'th' world: O Tempests and Whirlwinds (who but that man whom the forefinger cannot daunt, that makes his shame his living:) Who but that man I say, could endure to be thoroughly married? Nothing but a divorce can relieve me: any way to be rid of her would rid my torment: if all means fail I'll kill, or poison her, and purge my fault at sea: but first I'll make gentle Try of a Divorce: But how shall I accuse her subtle honesty? I'll attach this Lords coming to her, take hold of that: ask counsel: and now I remember, I have acquaintance with an old crafty Client, who by the puzzle of suits & shifting of Courts, has more tricks & starting holes, than the dizzy pates of fifteen Attorneys: one that has been muzzled in Law like a Bear, and lead by the Ring of his spectacles from office to office: him I'll seek out with haste, all paths I'll tread, All deaths I'll die ere I die married. Puh, you do resist me hardly. I beseech your Lordship cease in this, 'tis never to be granted: if you come as a friend unto my honour and my husband, you shall be ever welcome, if not, I must entreat it— Why assure yourself, madam, 'tis not the fashion. 'tis more my grief my Lord, such as myself are judged the worse for such. Faith you're too nice, you'll see me kindly forth: And honourably welcome. Gentlemen, you're most neatly welcome. You're very cleanly Sir, prithee have a care to our Geldings. Your Geldings shall be well considered. Considered? Sirrah, what Guess does this Inn hold now? Some five and twenty Gentlemen besides their beasts. Their Beasts? Their wenches I mean sir, for your worship knows those that are udder men are beasts. How does your Mother sit? Very well in health I thank you heartily sir. And so is my Mare i'faith. I'll do her commendations indeed sir. Well kept up Shuttlecock: But what old fellow was he that newly alighted before us? Who he? as arrant a crafty fellow as ere made water on horseback: some say he's as good as a Lawyer, (marry I'm sure he's as bad as a Knave) if you have any suits in law, he's the fittest man for your company: has been so toward and lugged himself, that he is able to afford you more knavish counsel for ten groats, then another for ten shillings. A fine fellow: but do you know him to be a Knave, and will lodge him.
nodes 222–250 (positions in the processed text, not lines of the printed book) · chunk 6 of 40 in this edition
Length
492 words · 662 tokens
Topic (seed 42)
T23 — Husbands, wives and jealousycross-work theme (confirmed, in the genre comparison) · typicality 0.763 (cosine to the topic centroid)
Other seeds
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
I loue to auoide ſtrife, Not many monthes Phoenix ſhall keepe his life. So, his way is in, he knowes it, We muſt not be vncurteous to a Lord, Warne him our houſe t'were vilde: his preſence is an honour, if he lie with our wiues, tis for our credite, wee ſhall be the better truſted, tis a ſigne wee ſhall liue ith world: O Tempeſts and Whirlewinds (who but that man whom the forefinger cannot daunt, that makes his ſhame his liuing:) Who but that man I ſay, could endure to be throughly married? Nothing but a diuorce can relieue me: any way to be rid of her would rid my torment: if all meanes faile Ile kil, or poyſon her, and purge my fault at ſea: but firſt Ile make gentle Trie of a Diuorce: But how ſhal I accuſe her ſubtle honeſtie? Ile attach this Lords comming to her, take hold of that: ask counſell: and now I remember, I haue acquaintance with an olde craftie Client, who by the puzzle of ſuites & ſhifting of Courts, has more tricks & ſtarting holes, then the dizzie pates of fifteene Atturneys: one that has beene muzled in Law like a Beare, and lead by the Ring of his ſpectacles from office to office: him Ile ſeeke out with haſte, all paths Ile tread, All deathes Ile die ere I die married. Puh, you doe reſiſt me hardly. I beſeech your Lordſhip ceaſe in this, Tis neuer to be grāted: if you come as a friend vnto my honour and my husband, you ſhall be euer welcome, if not, I muſt intreate it— Why aſſure your ſelfe, Madame, tis not the faſhion. Tis more my griefe my Lord, ſuch as my ſelfe are iudg'd the worſe for ſuch. Faith y' are too nice, youle ſee me kindly forth: And honourably welcome. Gentlemen, y' are moſte neately welcome. Y' are very cleanelye Sir, prethee haue a care to our Geldings. Your Geldings ſhall be well conſidered. Conſidered? Sirha, what Gueſſe do's this Inne holde now? Some fiue and twentie Gentlemen beſides their beaſtes. Their Beaſtes? Their wenches I meane ſir, for your worſhip I nowes thoſe that are vdder men are beaſtes. How do's your Mother ſit? Verie well in health I thanke you heartily ſir. And ſo is my Mare y faith. Ile doe her commendations indeede ſir. Well kept vp Shuttle-cocke: But what olde fellow was he that newly alighted before vs? Who he? as arrant a craftie fellow as ere made water on horſebacke: ſome ſay hee's as good as a Lawyer, (marrie 'ime ſure hee's as bad as a Knaue) if you haue any ſuites in lawe, hee's the fitteſt man for your companie: ha's beene ſo▪ toward and lug'd himſelfe▪ that hee is able to affood you more knauiſh counſell for tenne groates, then another for ten ſhillings. A fine fellowe: but doe you know him to be a Knaue, and will lodge him.