The Woman Hater (The Hungry Courtier) · chunk 23 of 46
Beaumont, Francis / Fletcher, John · published 1607 · first performed or written 1606 (Annals) comedy · Children of Paul's (second) T0 Court life: dukes, favour and honour typicality 0.82 · 484 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of T0: duke, lord, duchess, love, court, madam, prince, honour, grace, lady.
But how to compass it, search, east about, and bang your brains, Lazarello, thou art to dull and heavy to deserve a blessing. My Lord, I will not be idle; now Lazarello, think, think, think. Yonder's my Informer And his fellow with table books, they nod at me Upon my life, they have poor Lazarello that beats His brains about no such weighty matter, in for Treason before this— My Lord, what do you think, if I should shave myself, Put on midwives apparel, come in with a handkercher, And beg a piece for a great bellied woman, or a sick child? Good, very good. Or corrupt the waiting prentice to betray the reversion. there's another point in's plot, corrupt with money to betray: sure 'tis some Fort a means: mark, have a care. And 'twere the bare vinegar 'tis eaten with, it would in some sort satisfy nature: but might I once attain the dish itself, though I cut out my means through swords and fire, through poison, through any thing that may make good my hopes. Thanks to the gods, and our officiousness, the plots discovered, fire, steel, and poison, burn the Palace, kill the Duke, and poison his privy Counsel. To the mercers, let me see: how if before we can attain the means, to make up our acquaintance, the fish be eaten? If it be eaten, here a stands, that is the most dejected, most unfortunate, miserable, accursed, forsaken slave, this Province yields: I will not sure outlive it, no I will die bravely, and like a Roman; and after death, amidst the Elysian shades, I'll meet my love again. I will die bravely, like a Roman: have a care, mark that: when he hath done all, he will kill himself. Will no thing ease your appetite but this? No could the sea throw up his vastness, And offer free his best inhabitants: 'twere not so much as a bare temptation to me. If you could be drawn to affect Beef, Venison, or fowl, 'twould be far the better. I do beseech your Lordship's patience, I do confess that in this heat of blood, I have contemned all dull and grosser meats, But I protest, I do honour a Chine of beef, I do reverence a loin of veal, But good my Lord, give me leave a little to adore this: But my good Lord, would your Lordship under colour of taking up some silks, go to the Mercers, I would in all humility attend your honour, where we may be invited, if Fortune stand propitious. Sir you shall work me as you please. Let it be suddenly, I do beseech your Lordship, 'tis now upon the point of dinner time. I am all yours. Come let us confer, Inprimis a saith like a blasphemous villain, he is greater than the Duke, this peppers him, & there were nothing else.
seed 43: T0 · seed 44: T0 — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
But how to compasse it, search, east about, and bang your braines, Lazarello, thou art to dull and heauy to deserue a blessing. My Lord, I will not be idle; now Lazarello, thinke, thinke, thinke. Yonders my Informer And his fellow with table bookes, they nod at me Vpon my life, they haue poore Lazarello that beats His braines about no such waighty matter, in for Treason before this— My Lord, what doe you thinke, if I should shaue my selfe, Put on midwiues apparell, come in with a hand-kercher, And beg a peece for a great bellied womā, or a sick child? Good, very good. Or corrupt the waiting prentise to betray the reuersion. Ther's another point in's plot, corrupt with money to betray: sure 'tis some Fort a meanes: marke, haue a care. And 'twere the bare vineger 'tis eaten with, it would in some sort satisfie nature: but might I once attaine the dish it selfe, though I cut out my meanes through swords and fire, through poison, through any thing that may make good my hopes. Thankes to the gods, and our officiousnes, the plots discouered, fire, steele, and poison, burne the Palace, kill the Duke, and poison his priuie Counsell. To the mercers, let me see: how if before we can attain the means, to make vp our acquaintāce, the fish be eaten? If it be eaten, here a stāds, that is the most deiected, most vnfortunate, miserable, accursed, forsaken slaue, this Prouince yeeldes: I will not sure outliue it, no I will die brauely, and like a Roman; and after death, amidst the Elizian shades, Ile meete my loue againe. I will die brauely, like a Roman: haue a care, mark that: when he hath done all, he will kill himselfe. Will no thing ease your appetite but this? No could the sea throw vp his vastnesse, And offer free his best inhabitants: 'twere not so much as a bare temptation to me. If you could be drawne to affect Beef, Venison, or Fowle, twold be farre the better. I doe beseech your Lordhips patience, I doe confesse that in this heat of bloud, I haue contemn'd all dull and grosser meats, But I protest, I doe honor a Chine of beefe, I doe reuerence a loyne of veale, But good my Lord, giue me leaue a little to adore this: But my good Lord, would your Lordship vnder colour of taking vp some silkes, goe to the Mercers, I would in all humilitie attend your honor, where we may be inuited, if Fortune stand propitious. Sir you shall worke me as you please. Let it be suddenly, I doe beseech your Lordship, 'tis now vpon the point of dinner time. I am all yours. Come let vs conferre, Inprimis a saith like a blasphemous villaine, he is greater thē the Duke, this pepers him, & there were nothing else.