The Woman Hater (The Hungry Courtier) · chunk 45 of 46
Beaumont, Francis / Fletcher, John · published 1607 · first performed or written 1606 (Annals) comedy · Children of Paul's (second) unassigned nearest T49 Wooing a mistress: suitors, go-betweens · 477 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T49: mistress, gentleman, love, lady, woman, pray, gentlewoman, hear, honest, way.
Sir ye must be content, will ye sit down? nay do it willingly. Arrigo tie his arms close to the chair, I dare not trust his patience. may'st thou be quickly old and painted; may'st thou dote upon some sturdy Yeoman of the woodyard, and he be honest; may'st thou be barred the lawful lechery of thy Coach for want of Instruments; and last, be thy womb unopened. This fellow hath a pretty gall. My Lord, I hope to see him purged ere a part. Your Ladyships are welcome: I must desire your helps, though you are no Physicians, to do a strange cure upon this Gentleman. In what we can assist ye Madam, ye may command us. Now do I fit like a conjuror within my circle, and these the Devils that are raised about me, I will pray that they may have no power upon me. Ladies fall off in couples, then with a soft still march with low demeanours, charge this Gentleman: i'll be your leader. Let me be quartered Duke quickly, I can endure it: these women, long for man's flesh, let them have it. Count, have you ever seen so strange a passion? what would this fellow do, if a should find himself in bed with a young Lady? Faith my Lord, if a could get a knife, sure a would cut her throat, or else a would do as Hercules did by Lycas, swing out her soul: has the true hate of a woman in him. Low with your curtsies Ladies. Come not too near me, I have a breath will poison ye, my lungs are rotten, and my stomach raw; I am given much to belching: hold off, as you love sweet airs; Ladies by your first night's pleasure, I conjure you, as you would have your husband's proper men, strong backs, and little legs, as you would have 'em hate your waiting women. Sir we must court ye till we have obtained some little favour from those gracious eyes, 'tis but a kiss a piece. I pronounce perdition to ye all; ye are a parcel of that damned Crew, that fell down with Lucifer, and here ye stayed on earth, to plague poor men; vanish, avaunt, I am fortified against your charms; heaven grant me breath and patience. Shall we not kiss then? No, fear my lips with hot irons first, or stitch them up like a ferret's: O that this brunt were over. Come, come, little rogue, thou art too maidenly by my troth, I think I must box thee, till thou be'st boulder; the more bold, the more welcome: I pray thee kiss me, be not afraid? If there be any here, that yet have so much of the fool left in them, as to love their Mothers, let them look on her, and loathe them too.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Sir ye must bee content, will ye sit downe? nay doe it willingly. Arrigo tie his armes close to the chaire, I dare not trust his patience. Mai'st thou be quickly old and painted; mai'st thou dote vpon some sturdy Yeoman of the wood-yarde, and he be honest; mai'st thou be bar'd the lawfull lechery of thy Coach for want of Instruments; and last, bee thy wombe vnopen'd. This fellow hath a prety gaule. My Lord, I hope to see him purg'd ere a part. Your Ladiships are welcome: I must desire your helpes, though you are no Phisitions, to doe a strange cure vpon this Gentleman. In what we can assist ye Maddam, ye may commaund vs. Now do I fit like a Coniurer within my circle, and these the Diuels that are rais'd about mee, I will pray that they may haue no power vpon me. Ladies fall off in couples, then with a soft still march with low demeanures, charge this Gentleman: ile be your leader. Let me be quarter'd Duke quickly, I can endure it: these women, long for mans flesh, let them haue it. Count, haue you euer seene so strange a passion? what would this fellow doe, if a should find himselfe in bed with a yong Ladie? Faith my Lord, if a cou'd get a knife, sure a wo'd cut her throte, or else a wo'd doe as Hercules did by Lyeas, swing out her soule: has the true hate of a womā in him. Low with your curseyes Ladies. Come not too neere me, I haue a breath will poyson yee, my lungs are rotten, and my stomack rawe; I am giuen much to belching: hold off, as you loue sweet aires; Ladies by your first nights pleasure, I coniure you, as you wo'd haue your husbands proper men, strong backes, and little legges, as you would haue 'um hate your waiting women. Sir we must court yee till wee haue obtain'd some little fauour from those gracious eyes, tis but a kis a peece. I pronounce perdition to ye all; ye are a parcell of that damned Crew, that fell downe with Lucifer, and here yee stayd on earth, to plague poore men; vanish, auaunt, I am fortified against your charmes; heauen grant me breath and patience. Shall we not kisse then? No, feare my lips with hot irons first, or stitch them vp like a Ferrets: O that this brunt were ouer. Come, come, little rogue, thou art too maidenly by my troth, I thinke I must boxe thee, till thou bee'st boulder; the more bold, the more welcome: I pre thee kis me, be not afraid? If there bee any here, that yet haue so much of the foole left in them, as to loue their Mothers, let them looke on her, and loath them too.