Sharpham, Edward · published 1607 · first performed or written 1607 (Annals) comedy · Children of the King's Revels T23 Husbands, wives and jealousy typicality 0.91 · 465 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of T23: wife, husband, cuckold, jealousy, woman, jealous, mistress, love, house, honest.
O sir, What make you here, when there's a gallant Gentleman newly come from Court, talking within with my Lady. Yet more Courtiers, more Gallants, more Gentlemen? now in a hundred thousand horned devils names, what makes a there? what is a gone to bed to your Lady? doth a Cuckold me in mine own house, in mine own chamber? nay in mine own Sheets? what he's come to visit her to, is a not, ha? But let me see, I have now found out a trick to know if my wife make me a Cuckold, I will geld myself, & then if my wife be with child, I shall be sure I am a Cuckold, that will do brave i'faith, God a mercy brain. Sir, I am sorry that I cannot with that free scope of friendly entertainment, give welcome to your worth, because a jealous spirit haunts my husband, which doth disturb us all, this devil hath long vexed him, and he as long vexed me, & were I not composed of more than of an ordinary female spirit, the burden of his wrongs would tire me quite. Sir, this is my husband. I cry ye mercy sir, I did not see ye. A man would think ye saw me, for I am sure ye have hit me right enough. I pray sir be not angry, I have not any way offended you, nor would— Nay, nay, though I be, ye may be friends again with me in spite of my teeth, for look ye sir: my wife and I are but one, and then though I fall out with you, you may fall in with her. Sir, I come not to offend you, nor— Nay, nay, ye may, ye may i'faith, ye may, my wife is charitable, and would be glad by such a means to make us friends. Sir, then know, I scorn my eyes should stand as witnesses unto your ladies' wrongs, and let you go unpunished: slight see a sweet Lady abused! Sir you shall not touch him, husband you are to blame, your madness makes you much forget your manners, and wrongs my his birth, to make me the only cankered, and worm eaten branch that sprung out of my fafathers noble stock. No, no, know that the tree from which I grew, brought forth good fruit to all, not bad to you: but hence forth i'll shake hands with mirth; and entertain a careless humour: for look ye sir, the Devil gives this jealousy to man, as nature doth a tail unto a Lion, which thinks in heat to beat away the Flies, when he doth most enrage himself with it: but come sir, will ye be my servant, my cipher, my shadow, or indeed any thing?
nodes 66–77 (positions in the processed text, not lines of the printed book) · chunk 3 of 46 in this edition
Length
465 words · 596 tokens
Topic (seed 42)
T23 — Husbands, wives and jealousycross-work theme (confirmed, in the genre comparison) · typicality 0.911 (cosine to the topic centroid)
Other seeds
seed 43: T26 · seed 44: T28 — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
O sir, What make you heere, when there's a gallant Gentleman newly come from Court, talking within with my Lady. Ye more Courtiers, more Gallants, more Gentlemen? now in a hūdred thousand horned diuils names, what makes a there? what is a gone to bed to your Lady? doth a Cuckold mee in mine own house, in mine own chamber? nay in mine owne Sheets? what he's come to visite her to, is a not, ha? But let me see, I haue now found out a tricke to know if my wife make me a Cuckold, I will geld my selfe, & then if my wife be with childe, I shal be sure I am a Cuckold, that will do braue yfaith, God a merie braine. Sir, I am sorry that I cannot with that free scope of friendly entertainment, giue welcome to your worth, because a iealious spirit haunts my husband, which doth disturbe vs all, this diuill hath long vext hm, and hee as long vext me, & were I not compos'd of more then of an ordinarie female spirit, the burthen of his wrongs would tyre me quite. Sir, this is my husband. I cry ye mercy sir, I did not see ye. A man would thinke ye saw me, for I am sure yee haue hit me right enough. I pray sir be not angrie, I haue not any way offended you, nor would— Nay, nay, though I be, ye may be friendes again with me in spite of my teeth, for looke ye sir: my wife and I are but one, and then though I fall out with you, you may fall in with her. Sir, I come not to offend you, nor— Nay, nay, ye may, ye may yfaith, ye may, my wife is charitable, and would bee glad by such a meanes to make vs friends. Sir, then knowe, I scorne my eyes should stand as witnesses vnto your Ladies wrongs, and let you goe vnpunished: slight see a sweet Lady abusde! Sir you shall not touch him, husband you are to blame, your madnesse makes you much forget your manners, and wronges my hi birth, to make me the only cankerd, and worme eaten braunch that sprung out of my fafathers noble stocke. No, no, knowe that the tree from which I grew, brought foorth good fruite to all, not bad to you: but hence foorth ile shake handes with mirth; and entertaine a carelesse humor: for looke ye sir, the Diuell giues this iellousie to man, as nature doth a taile vnto a Lyon, which thinkes in heat to beate away the Flies, when he doth moste inrage himselfe with it: but come sir, will ye bee my seruant, my sipher, my shadowe, or indeede anye thing?