The Puritan, or The Widow of Watling Street (The Puritan Widow) · chunk 5 of 37
Middleton, Thomas · published 1607 · first performed or written 1606 (Annals) comedy · Children of Paul's (second) unassigned nearest T47 Knaves, thieves and bawds · 473 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T47: knave, rogue, money, knaves, thief, rogues, pray, whore, nichol, book.
Well, would I had been borne a Knave then, when I was borne a Beggar, for if the truth were known, I think I was begot when my Father had never a penny in his purse. Puh, faint not old Skirmish, let this warrant thee, Facilis Descensus Auerni, 'tis an easy journey to a Knave, thou mayst be a Knave when thou wilt; and Peace is a good Madam to all other professions, and an arrant Drab to us, let us handle her accordingly, and by our wits thrive in despite of her; for since the law lives by quarrels, the Courtier by smooth Good-morrows, and every profession makes itself greater by imperfections, why not we then by shifts, wiles, and forgeries? and seeing our brains are our only Patrimonies, let's spend with judgement, not like a desperate son and heir, but like a sober and discreet templar,— one that will never march beyond the bounds of his allowance, and for our thriving means, thus, I myself will put on the Deceit of a Fortune-teller, a Fortune-teller. Very proper. And you of a figure-caster, or a conjuror. A conjuror. Let me alone, I'll instruct you, and teach you to deceive all eyes, but the devils. Oh ay, for I would not deceive him and I could choose, of all others. Fear not I warrant you; and so by those means we shall help one another to Patients, as the condition of the age affords creatures enough for cunning to work upon. Oh wondrous new fools and fresh Asses. Oh, fit, fit, excellent. What in the name of Conjuring? My memory greets me happily with an admirable subject to graze upon. The lady-widow, who of late I saw weeping in her Garden for the death of her Husband, sure she's but a waterish soul, and half on't by this time is dropped out of her eyes: device well managed may do good upon her: it stands firm, my first practice shall be there? You have my voice George? Sh'as a grey gull to her Brother, a fool to her only son, and an Ape to her youngest Daughter;— I overheard 'em severally, and from their words I'll derive my device; and thou old Peter Skirmish shall be my second in all sleights. near doubt me George Pye-boord.— only you must teach me to conjure. Push, I'll perfect thee, Peter: How now? what's he? Oh George! this sight kills me, 'tis my sworn Brother, Captain Idle. Captain Idle. Apprehended for some felonious act or other, he has started out, h'as made a Night on't, lacked silver; I cannot but commend his resolution, he would not pawn his buff-jerkin, I would either some of us were employed, or might pitch our Tents at usurers doors, to kill the slaves as they peep out at the Wicket.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Well, would I had beene borne a Knaue then, when I was borne a Begger, for if the truth were knowne, I thinke I was begot when my Father had euer a penny in his purse. uh, faint not old Skirmish, let this warrant thee, Facilis Descensus Aueri, 'tis an easie iourney to a Knaue, thou maist bee a Knaue when thou wilt; and Peace is a good Madam to all other professions, and an arrant Drabbe to vs, let vs handle her accordingly, and by our wittes thriue in despight of her; for since the lawe liues by quarrelis, the Courtier by smooth God-morrowes, and euery profession makes it selfe greater by imperfections, why not wee then by shiftes, wiles, and forgeries? and seeing our braines are ou onely Patrimonies, let's sped with iudgment, not like a desperate sonne and heire, but like a sober and discreete Templer,—one that will neuer marche beyond the bounds of his allowance, and for our thriuing meanes, thus, I my selfe will put on the Deceit of a Fortune-teller, a Fortune-teller. Very proper. And you of a figure-caster, or a Coniurer. A Coniurer. Let me alone, Ile instruct you, and teach you to deceiue all eyes, but the Diuels. Oh I, for I would not deceiue him and I could choose, of all others. Feare not I warrant you; and so by those meanes wee shall helpe one another to Patients, as the condition of the age affoords creatures enow for cunning to worke vpon. Oh wondrous new fooles and fresh Asses. Oh, fit, fit, excellent. What in the name of Coniuring? My memorie greetes mee happily with an admirable subiect to graze vpon. The Lady-Widdow, who of late I sawe weeping in her Garden for the death of her Husband, sure she as but a watrish soule, and hale on't by this time is dropt out of her Lyes: deuice well managde may doe good vppon her: it stands firme, my first practie shall bee there? You haue my voyce George? Sh'as a gray Gall to her Brother, a foole to her onely sonne, and an Ape to her yongest Daughter;—I ouerheard 'em seuerally, and from their words Ile deriue my deuice; and thou old Peter Skirmish shall be my second in all slights. Nere doubt mee George Pye-boord.—onely you must each me to coniure. Push, Ile perfect thee, Peter: How now? what's hee? Oh George! this sight kils me, Tis my sworne Brother, Captaine Idle. Captaine Idle. Apprehended for some fellonious act or other, hee has started out, h'as made a Night on't, lackt siluer; I cannot but commend his resolution, he would not pawne his Buffe-Ierkin, I would eyther some of vs were employde, or might pitch our Tents at Vsurers doores, to kill the slaues as they peepe out at the Wicket.