Jonson, Ben · published 1616 · first performed or written 1609 (Annals) comedy · Children of the Queen's Revels unassigned nearest T28 Marriage-making: weddings, brides and ma · 435 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T28: married, marriage, wedding, day, bride, father, wife, luce, love, husband.
Nothing, sir, that I know, but your itch of marriage. Why? if I had made an assassinate upon your father; vitiated your mother; ravished your sisters— I would kill you, sir, I would kill you, if you had. Why? you do more in this, sir: It were a vengeance centuple, for all facinorous acts, that could be named, to do that you do— Alas, sir, I am but a messenger: I but tell you, what you must hear. It seems, your friends are careful after your soul's health, sir, and would have you know the danger (but you may do your pleasure, for all them, I persuade not, sir) If, after you are married, your wife do run away with a vaulter, or the Frenchman that walks upon ropes, or him that dances the jig, or a fencer for his skill at his weapon, why it is not their fault; they have discharged their consciences: when you know what may happen. Nay, suffer valiantly, sir, for I must tell you, all the perils that you are obnoxious too. If she be fair, young, and vegetous, no sweet meats ever drew more flies; all the yellow doublets, and great roses i' the town will be there. If foul, and crooked, she'll be with them, and buy those doublets and roses, sir. If rich, and that you marry her dowry, not her; she'll reign in your house, as imperious as a widow. If noble, all her kindred will be your tyrants. If fruitful, as proud as May, and humorous as April; she must have her doctors, her midwives, her nurses, her long every hour: though it be for the dearest morsel of man. If learned, there was never such a parrot; all your patrimony will be too little for the guests, that must be invited, to hear her speak Latin and Greek: and you must lie with her in those languages too, if you will please her. If precise, you must feast all the silenced brethren, once in three days; salute the sisters; entertain the whole family, or wood of 'em; and hear long-winded exercises, sing, and catechisings, which you are not given to, and yet must give for: to please the zealous matron your wife, who, for the holy cause, will cozen you, over and above. You begin to sweat, sir? but this is not half, i'faith: you may do your pleasure notwithstanding, as I said before, I come not to persuade you. Upon my faith, master serving man, if you do stir, I will beat you. O, what is my sin! what is my sin?
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: T7 — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Nothing, sir, that I know, but your itch of marriage. Why? if I had made an assassinate vpon your father; vitiated your mother; rauished your sisters— I would kill you, sir, I would kill you, if you had. Why? you doe more in this, sir: It were a vengeance centuple, for all facinorous acts, that could be nam'd, to doe that you doe— Alas, sir, I am but a messenger: I but tell you, what you must heare. It seemes, your friends are carefull after your soules health, sir, and would haue you know the danger (but you may doe your pleasure, for all them, I perswade not, sir) If, after you are married, your wife doe run away with a vaulter, or the Frenchman that walkes vpon ropes, or him that daunces the iig, or a sencer for his skill at his weapon, why it is not their fault; they haue discharged their consciences: when you know what may happen. Nay, suffer valiantly, sir, for I must tell you, all the perills that you are obnoxious too. If shee be faire, yong, and vegetous, no sweet meats euer drew more flies; all the yellow doublets, and great roses i' the towne will bee there. If foule, and crooked, shee'll bee with them, and buy those doublets and roses, sir. If rich, and that you marry her dowry, not her; shee'll raigne in your house, as imperious as a widow. If noble, all her kindred will be your tyrannes. If fruitfull, as proud as May, and humorous as April; she must haue her doctors, her midwiues, her nurses, her longings euery houre: though it be for the dearest morsell of man. If learned, there was neuer such a parrat; all your patrimony will be too little for the guests, that must be inuited, to heare her speake Latine and Greeke: and you must lie with her in those languages too, if you will please her. If precise, you must feast all the silenc'd brethren, once in three daies; salute the sisters; entertaine the whole family, or wood of 'hem; and heare long-winded exercises, singings, and catechisings, which you are not giuen to, and yet must giue for: to please the zealous matron your wife, who, for the holy cause, will cosen you, ouer and aboue. You beginne to sweat, sir? but this is not halfe, i'faith: you may do your pleasure notwithstanding, as I said before, I come not to perswade you. Vpon my faith, master seruing man, if you doe stirre, I will beat you. O, what is my sinne! what is my sinne?