Greene's Tu Quoque, or The City Gallant · chunk 41 of 47
Cooke, John · published 1614 · first performed or written 1611 (Annals) comedy · Queen Anne's Men T45 Widows, wooing and remarriage typicality 0.89 · 500 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of T45: widow, widows, hoord, master, gentlemen, wife, randalls, wit, mistress, married.
Why sure the man is mad? bethink thyself, Thou hast forgot thy errand? I have indeed, fair Lady; for my errand Should first have been delivered on your lips. Why thou impudent fellow, unthrift of shame, As well as of thy purse; What has moved thee To prosecute thy ruin? hath my bounty, For which thy Master was an orator, Importune thee to pay me with abuse? Sirrah retire, or I will to your shame, With clamours raise the house, and make your Master For this attempt, return you to the Dungeon, From whence you came. Nay then I must be desperate: Widow, hold your Clapdish, fasten your Tongue Unto your Roof, and do not dare to call, But give me audience, with fear and silence: Come kiss me: No? This Dagger has a point, do you see it? And be unto my suit obedient, Or you shall feel it too: For I will rather totter, hang in clean Linen, Then live to scrub it out in lousy Linings. Go too, kiss: You will? why so: Again: the third time? Good, 'tis a sufficient Charm: Now hear me, You are rich in Money, Lands, and Lordships, Manors, and fair Possessions, and I have not so much As one poor Copyhold to thrust my head in. Why should you not then have compassion upon a reasonable handsome fellow, That has both youth and livelihood upon him; And can at midnight quicken and refresh Pleasures decayed in you? You want Children, And I am strong, lusty, and have a back Like Hercules, able to get them Without the help of Muscadine and Eggs: And will you then, that have enough, Take to your Bed a bundle of diseases, Wrapped up in threescore years, to lie a hawking, Spitting, and coughing backwards and forwards That you shall not sleep; but thrusting forth Your face out of the Bed, be glad to draw The Curtains, such a steam shall reek Out of this dunghill. Now what say you? Shall we without further wrangling clap it up, And go to Bed together? Will you hear me? Yes with all my heart, So the first word may be, Untruss your Points. Zounds one knocks: do not stir I charge you, Nor speak, but what I bid you: For by these Lips, which now in love I kiss, If you but struggle, or but raise your voice, My arm shall rise with it, and strike you dead. Go too, come on with me, and ask who's there? It is my Maid. No matter, do as I bid you: say, Who's there? Who's there? 'tis I, forsooth. If it be you, forsooth, then pray stay. Till I shall call upon you. If it be you forsooth, then pray you stay, Till shall call upon you. Very well, why now I see Thou'lt prove an obedient wise, come, let's undress. Will you put up your naked weapon sir? You shall pardon me (Widow) I must have you grant first.
seed 43: T40 · seed 44: T40 — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Why sure the man is madde? bethinke thy selfe, Thou hast forgot thy errand? I haue indeed, faire Lady; for my errand Should first haue been deliuered on your lippes. Why thou impudent fellow, vnthrift of shame, As well as of thy purse; What has mooud thee To prosecute thy ruine? hath my bountie, For which thy Maister was an orator, Importune thee to pay mee with abuse? Sirra retire, or I will to your shame, With clamors rayse the house, and make your Maister For this attempt, returne you to the Dungion, From whence you came. Nay then I must be desperate: Widdow, hold your Clapdish, fasten your Tongue Vnto your Roofe, and do not dare to call, But giue mee audience, with feare and silence: Come kisse mee: No? This Dagger has a poynt, doe you see it? And be vnto my suite obedient, Or you shall feele it too: For I will rather totter, hang in cleane Linnen, Then liue to scrub it out in lowsie Lynings. Goe too, kisse: You will? why so: Againe: the third time? Good, tis a sufficient Charme: Now heare mee, You are rich in Mony, Lands, and Lordships, Mannors, and fayre Possessions, and I haue not so much As one poore Coppy-hold to thrust my head in. Why should you not then haue compassion vpon a reasonable handsome fellow, That has both youth and liuelihood vpon him; And can at midnight quicken and refresh Pleasures decayed in you? You want Children, And I am strong, lusty, and haue a backe Like Hercules, able to get them Without the helpe of Muscadine and Eggs: And will you then, that haue inough, Take to your Bed a bundle of diseases, Wrapt vp in threescore yeares, to lie a hawking, Spitting, and coffing backwards and forwards That you shall not sleepe; but thrusting forth Your face out of the Bed, be glad to draw The Curtaines, such a steame shall reeke Out of this dunghill. Now what say you Shall we without further wrangling clap it vp, And goe to Bed togeather? Will you heare mee? Yes with all my heart, So the first word may bee, Vntrusse your Poynts. Zounds one knocks: do not stirre I charge you, Nor speake, but what I bid you: For by these Lippes, which now in loue I kisse, If you but struggle, or but rayse your voyce, My arme shall rise with it, and strike you dead. Go too, come on with mee, and aske who's there? It is my Mayde. No matter, doe as I bid you: say, Who's there? Who's there? Tis I, forsooth. If it be you, forsooth, then pray stay. Till I shall call vpon you. If it be you forsooth, then pray you stay, Till shall call vpon you. Very well, why now I see Thou'lt prooue an obedient wise, come, let's vndresse. Will you put vp your naked weapon sir? You shall pardon mee (Widdow) I must haue you grant first.