A Merry Dialogue between Band, Cuff, and Ruff · chunk 3 of 3
Anonymous · published 1615 · first performed or written 1615 (Annals) entertainment; academic entertainment · at University unassigned nearest T6 Money, debt and credit · 540 words · other edition — not in the analysis
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T6: money, master, pound, law, lawyer, chain, gentleman, gold, pay, pray.
Thy man, collar? thy Master, thou wouldst have said, I am sure he is thy upholder. Nay, surely he is his Master, at least his Maker: for Bands make rags; Rags make Paper, Paper makes Pasteboard, and Pasteboard makes Collar; and I think that this is a stiff argument that he is his Master. Well, be he what he will, if I catch his Collar, I'll cut him in jags, let me but clasp him, and I'll make him for stirring. But you shall not. Have you not Friends and Neighbours enough to end this controversy, but you must go into the fields, and there cut the thread of your lives? we'll have none of that: come choose you an Umpire, Band, for it shall be so. Since you will force me to it, if Ruff be content, I am willing. Ruff, you shall be content. If I shall, than I must, let him name him. If I may choose, I'll have Master Handkerchief. Nay, stay there, he is a most filthy Snivelling fellow, & a notable lawyer; he will wipe your Nose of all, if you put the case to him: but what say you to Shirt? He is a shifting knave, and one, to whom Band, a little before hath been much beholding. Why, they were joined a long time together in friendship. Why, then go to Master Cap, the headman of the Town. No, I deny that, he is a very bad justice, you may have him wrought on any side for money. I'll tell you what, than we will go to my Lord Corpus himself. He is not in Town. He is, for I saw Sock, his chief Footman here yesterday. here's ado with you, and my Lord Corpus, indeed, I would you were both hanged about his neck for me. But I see, this strife will never be ended, till I be Arbitrator myself, you know, I am equally allied to you both: shall I be Moderator between you? Content. Well then, thus I pronounce. Ruff shall be most accounted of amongst the Clergy, for he is the graver Fellow. (Although I know, the Puritans will not greatly care for him, he hath such a deal of setting, and they love standing better.) As for you, Band, you shall be most made of amongst the young Gallants (although sometimes they shall use Ruff, for a fashion, but not otherwise;) how ever, you need not regard the giddy headed multitude, let them do as they list, sometimes respecting one, sometimes the other: but when you come to the Counsellors, and men of Law, which know right from wrong, acknowledging both your Worths to be equal, they shall prefer neither, but use the kindness of you both, wearing both a Band and a Ruff; how say you, are you both content? We are. Then go before me to the next Tavern, and I'll follow after with a Band of your friendship drawn, which I hope these Gentlemen will seal with their hands. Claw me, and I'll claw thee, the proverb goes, Let it be true in that our Muse here shoes, Cuffe graceth hand, Cuffs debtors hands remain, Let hands clap me, and I'll Cuff them again.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Thy man, Coller? thy Maſter, thou wouldeſt haue ſaid, I am ſure hee is thy vpholder. Nay, ſurely he is his Maſter, at leaſt his Maker: for Bands make rags; Rags make Paper, Paper makes Paſt-board, and Paſt-board makes Collar; and I thinke that this is a ſtiffe argument that he is his Maſter. Well, be he what he will, if I catch his Collar, Ile cut him in iags, let me but claſpe him, and Ile make him for ſtirring. But you ſhall not. Haue you not Friends and Neighbours ynow to end this controuerſie, but you muſt goe into the fields, and there cut the threed of your liues? wee'l haue none of that: come chooſe you an Vmpire, Band, for it ſhall be ſo. Since you will force me to it, if Ruffe be content, I am willing. Ruffe, you ſhall be content. If I ſhall, then I muſt, let him name him. If I may chooſe, Ile haue Maſter Handkerchiefe. Nay, ſtay there, he is a moſt filthy Sniveling fellow, & a notable lawyer; he will wipe your Noſe of all, if you put the caſe to him: but what ſay you to Shirt? He is a ſhifting knaue, and one, to whom Band, a little before hath beene much beholding. Why, they were ioyned a long time together in friendſhip. Why, then goe to Maſter Cap, the headman of the Towne. No, I denie that, he is a very bad Iuſtice, you may haue him wrought on any ſide for monie. Ile tell you what, then we will goe to my Lord Corpus himſelfe. He is not in Towne. He is, for I ſaw Sock, his chiefe Footeman heere yeſterday. Heer's adoe with you, and my Lord Corpus, indeed, I would you were both hanged about his necke for me. But I ſee, this ſtrife will neuer be ended, til I be Arbitrator my ſelfe, you know, I am equally allied to you both: ſhall I be Moderator betweene you? Content. Well then, thus I pronounce. Ruffe ſhall be moſt accounted of amongſt the Clergie, for he is the grauer Fellow. (Although I know, the Puritans will not greatly care for him, hee hath ſuch a deale of ſetting, and they loue ſtanding better.) As for you, Band, you ſhall bee moſt made of amongſt the young Gallants (although ſometimes they ſhall vſe Ruffe, for a faſhion, but not otherwiſe;) how euer, you neede not regard the giddie headed multitude, let them doe as they liſt, ſometimes reſpecting one, ſometimes the other: but when you come to the Counſailors, and men of Law, which know right from wrong, acknowledging both your Worths to be equall, they ſhall preferre neither, but vſe the kindneſſe of you both, wearing both a Band and a Ruffe; how ſay you, are you both content? We are. Then goe before me to the next Tauerne, and Ile follow after with a Band of your friendſhip drawne, which I hope theſe Gentlemen will ſeale with their hands. Claw me, and Ile claw thee, the prouerb goes, Let it be true in that our Muſe here ſhoes, Cuffe graceth hand, Cuffes debtors hands remaine, Let hands clap me, and Ile Cuffe them againe.