The Devil's Law Case (When Women Go to Law the Devil Is Full of Business) · chunk 24 of 45
Webster, John · published 1623 · first performed or written 1619 [1617-1621] (Annals) tragicomedy · Queen Anne's Men unassigned nearest T11 Siblings, kin and confidants · 508 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T11: sister, brother, love, friend, heart, father, mother, woman, lord, hear.
Eat unripe fruit, and Oatmeal, to take away your colour. Dine in my bed some two hours afternoon. And when you are up, Make to your petticoat a quilted preface, To advance your belly. I have a strange conceit now. I have known some women when they were with child, Have longed to beat their Husbands: what if I, To keep decorum, exercise my longing Upon my tailor that way, and noddle him soundly, he'll make the larger Bill for't. I'll get one shall be as tractable to't as Stockfish. Oh my fantastical sorrow, Cannot I now be miserable enough, Unless I wear a pied fool's coat: Nay worse, for when our passions Such giddy and uncertain changes breed, We are never well, till we are mad indeed. So, nothing in the world could have done this, But to beget in her a strong distaste Of the Lord Contarino: oh jealousy, How violent, especially in women, How often has it raised the devil up in form of a law case! My especial care must be, to nourish craftily this fiend, 'tween the mother and the daughter, that the deceit Be not perceived. My next task, that my sister, After this supposed childbirth, be persuaded To enter into Religion: 'tis concluded, She must never marry; so I am left guardian To her estate: and lastly, that my two Surgeons Be waged to the East Indies: let them prate, When they are beyond the Line; the calenture, Or the Scurvy, or the Indian Pox, I hope, Will take order for their coming back. Oh here's my mother: I ha' strange news for you, My sister is with child. I do look now for some great misfortunes To follow: for indeed mischiefs, Are like the Visits of Franciscan Friars, They never come to pray upon us single. In what estate left you Contarino? Strange, that you can skip From the former sorrow to such a question! I'll tell you, in the absence of his Surgeon, My charity did that for him in a trice, They would have done at leisure, and been paid for't. I have killed him. I am twenty years elder since you last opened your lips. Ha? You have given him the wound you speak of, Quite thorough your mother's heart. I will heal it presently mother: for this sorrow Belongs to your error: you would have him live, Because you think he's father of the child; But Iolenta vows by all the rights of Truth, 'tis Ercole's: it makes me smile to think, How cunningly my sister could be drawn To the Contract, and yet how familiarly To his bed. doves never couple Without a kind of murmur. Oh, I am very sick. Your old disease, when you are grieved, You are troubled with the Mother. I am rapt with the Mother indeed, That I ever bore such a son. Pray tend my sister, I am infinitely full of business. Stay you will mourn for Contarino. Oh by all means, 'tis fit, my sister is his heir.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Eat vnripe fruit, and Oatmeale, to take away your colour. Dine in my bed some two houres after noone. And when you are vp, Make to your petticoat a quilted preface, To aduance your belly. I haue a strange conceit now. I haue knowen some women when they were with child, Haue long'd to beat their Husbands: what if I, To keepe decorum, exercise my longing Vpon my Taylor that way, and noddle him soundly, Heele make the larger Bill for't. Ile get one shall be as tractable too't as Stockfish. Oh my phantasticall sorrow, Cannot I now be miserable enough, Vnlesse I weare a pyde fooles coat: Nay worse, for when our passions Such giddy and vncertaine changes breed, We are neuer well, till we are mad indeed. So, nothing in the world could haue done this, But to beget in her a strong distaste Of the Lord Contarino: oh Ielousie, How violent, especially in women, How often has it raisd the deuil vp in forme of a law case! My especiall care must be, to nourish craftily this fiend, Tweene the mother and the daughter, that the deceit Be not perceiued. My next taske, that my sister, After this suppofed child-birth, be perswaded To enter into Religion: tis concluded, Shee must neuer marry; so I am left guardian To her estate: and lastly, that my two Surgeons Be waged to the East Indies: let them prate, When they are beyond the Lyne; the Callenture, Or the Scuruy, or the Indian Pox, I hope, Will take order for their comming backe. Oh heere's my mother: I ha strange newes for you, My sister is with child. I doe looke now for some great misfortunes To follow: for indeed mischiefes, Are like the Visits of Franciscan Fryers, They neuer come to pray vpon vs single. In what estate left you Contarino? Strange, that you can skip From the former sorrow to such a question! Ile tell you, in the absence of his Surgeon, My charitie did that for him in a trice, They would haue done at leasure, and been paid for't. I haue killed him. I am twentie yeares elder since you last opened your lips. Ha? You haue giuen him the wound you speake of, Quite thorow your mothers heart. I will heale it presently mother: for this sorrow Belongs to your errour: you would haue him liue, Because you thinke hee's father of the child; But Iolenta vowes by all the rights of Truth, Tis Ercole's: it makes me smile to thinke, How cunningly my sister could be drawen To the Contract, and yet how familiarly To his bed. Doues neuer couple Without a kind of murmur. Oh, I am very sicke. Your old disease, when you are grieu'd, You are troubled with the Mother. I am rapt with the Mother indeed, That I euer bore such a sonne. Pray tend my sister, I am infinitely full of businesse. Stay you will mourne for Contarino. Oh by all meanes, tis fit, my sister is his heire.