Jonson, Ben · published 1631 · first performed or written 1626 [Feb] (Annals) comedy · King's Men unassigned nearest T31 Popes, cardinals and the crown · 498 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T31: cardinal, pope, king, lord, majesty, holy, rome, france, church, lords.
Ha'you any news from the Indieses? any mirac Done in Iapan, by the Iesuites? or in China? Not, but we hear of a Colony of cooks To be set a shore o' the coast of America, For the conversion of the Cannibals, And making them good, eating Cbristians. Here comes the Colonel that undertakes it. Who? captain Lickfinger? News, news my boys! I am to furnish a great feast to day, And I would have what news the Office affords. We were venting some of you, of your new project, Afore 'twas paid for, you were somewhat too hasty. What Lickfinger! wilt thou convert the Cannibals, With spit and pan Divinity? Sir, for that I will not urge, but for the fire and zeal To the true cause; thus I have undertaken: With two Lay-brothers, to myself, no more, Oleo the broach, th'other o'the boiler, In one six months, and by plain cookery, No magic to't, but old japhets' physic, The father of the European Arts, To make such sauces for the Savages, And cooks their meats, with those enticing steams, As it would make our Caniball-Christians, Forbear the mutual eating one another, Which they do do, more cunningly, than the wild Anthropophagis; that snatch only strangers, Like my old Patron's dogs, there. O, my Uncles! Is dinner ready, Lickfinger? When you please, Sir. I was bespeaking but a parcel of news, To strew out the long meal withal, but it seems You are furnished here already. O, not half! What Court-news is there? any Proclamations, Or Edicts to come forth. Yes, there is one. That the King's Barber has got, for aid of our trade: Whereof there is a manifest decay. A Precept for the wearing of long hair, To run to seed, to sow bald pates withal, And the preserving fruitful heads, and chins, To help a mystery, almost antiquated. Such as are bald and barren beyond hope, Are to be separated, and set by For Ushers, to old Countesses. And Coachmen. To mount their boxes, reverently, and drive, Like Lapwings, with a shell vpo' their heads. Thorough the streets. Ha' you no News o'the Stage? They'll ask me above new Plays, at dinner time. And I should be as dumb as a fish. O! yes. There is a Legacy left to the King's Players, Both for their various shifting of their Scene, And dexterous change o'their persons to all shapes, And all disguises: by the right reverend Archbishop of Spalleto. He is dead, That played him! Than, h'has lost his share o' the Legacy. What news of Gundomar? A second Fistula, Or an excoriation (at the lest) For putting the poor English-play, was writ of him, To such a sordid use, as (is said) he did, Of cleansing his posteriors. justice! justice! Since when, he lives condemned to his share, at Brussels. And there sits filing certain politic hinges, To hung the States on, h'has heaved of the hooks. What must you have for these?
seed 43: T22 · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Ha'you any newes from the Indies? any mirac Done in Iapan, by the Ieſuites? or in China? No, but we heare of a Colony of cookes To be ſet a ſhore o' the coaſt of America, For the conuerſion of the Caniballs, And making them good, eating Cbriſtians. Here comes the Colonell that vndertakes it. Who? captaine Lickfinger? Newes, newes my boyes! I am to furniſh a great feaſt to day, And I would haue what newes the Office affords. We were venting ſome of you, of your new project, Afore 'twas paid for, you were ſomewhat too haſty. What Lickfinger! wilt thou conuert the Caniballs, With ſpit and pan Diuinity? Sir, for that I will not vrge, but for the fire and zeale To the true cauſe; thus I haue vndertaken: With two Lay-brethren, to my ſelfe, no more, Oeo the broach, th'other o'the boyler, In one ſixe months, and by plaine cookery, No magick to't, but old Iaphets phyſicke, The father of the Europaean Arts, To make ſuch ſauces for the Sauages, And cookes their meats, with thoſe inticing ſteemes, As it would make our Caniball-Chriſtians, Forbeare the mutuall eating one another, Which they doe doe, more cunningly, then the wilde Anthropophagi; that ſnatch onely ſtrangers, Like my old Patrons dogs, there. O, my Vncles! Is dinner ready, Lickfinger? When you pleaſe, Sir. I was beſpeaking but a parcell of newes, To ſtrew out the long meale withall, but 't ſeemes You are furniſh'd here already. O, not halfe! What Court-newes is there? any Proclamations, Or Edicts to come forth. Yes, there is one. That the Kings Barber has got, for aid of our trade: Whereof there is a manifeſt decay. A Precept for the wearing of long haire, To runne to ſeed, to ſow bald pates withall, And the preſeruing fruitfull heads, and chins, To help a miſtery, almoſt antiquated. Such as are bald and barren beyond hope, Are to be ſeparated, and ſet by For Vſhers, to old Counteſſes. And Coachmen. To mount their boxes, reuerently, and driue, Like Lapwings, with a ſhell vpo' their heads. Thorow the ſtreets. Ha' you no Newes o'the Stage? They'll aske me abou new Playes, at dinner time. And I ſhould be as dumbe as a fiſh. O! yes. There is a Legacy left to the Kings Players, Both for their various ſhifting of their Scene, And dext'rous change o'their perſons to all ſhapes, And all diſguiſes: by the right reuerend Archbiſhop of Spalato. He is dead, That plai'd him! Then, h'has loſt his ſhare o' the Legacy. What newes of Gundomar? A ſecond Fiſtula, Or an excoriation (at the leaſt) For putting the poore Engliſh-play, was writ of him, To ſuch a ſordid vſe, as (is ſaid) he did, Of cleanſing his poſterior's. Iuſtice! Iuſtice! Since when, he liues condemn'd to his ſhare, at Bruxels. And there ſits filing certaine politique hinges, To hang the States on, h'has heau'd off the hookes. What muſt you haue for theſe?