A New Wonder, A Woman Never Vexed · chunk 13 of 45
Heywood, Thomas / Rowley, William · published 1632 · first performed or written 1611 [1611-1614] (Annals) comedy · Unknown unassigned nearest T49 Wooing a mistress: suitors, go-betweens · 484 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T49: mistress, gentleman, love, lady, woman, pray, gentlewoman, hear, honest, way.
No I'll stay awhile and tell 'em out with patience. I cannot hold a joint still; Dost wisp me, thou tatterdemalion; I'll do your errands, if I have a Husband; Oh that I could spit Wild fire! My heart, Oh my heart! If it does not go pantle, Pantle, pantle in my belly, I am no honest woman: But I'll do your errands. Kind Gentlewoman, you have some patience. I have too much Sir. You may do a good office, and make yourself a Peaceful moderator betwixt me and my angry Father, whom his wife hath moved to spleen Against me. Sir, I do not disallow the kindness your Consanguinity renders, I would not teach You otherwise; I'd speak with your Uncle, Sir, If you'll give me leave. You may talk with me Sir, in the mean time. With me would you talk, Gentlewoman? Yes Sir, with you; you are a brave Unthrift. Not very brave neither; yet I make a shift When you have a clean shirt. I'll be no Pupil to a woman; leave your discipline. Nay, pray you hear me Sir, I cannot chide. I'll but give you good counsel; 'tis not a good Course that you n. Yet I must run toth' end of it. I would teach you a better, if you'd stay where you are. I would stay where I am, if I had any money. In the dicing house? I think so too, I have played at Passage all This while, now I'd go to Hazard. Dost thou want Money? Thou art worthy to be tattered Hast thou no wit now thy Money's gone? 'Tis all the portion I have; I have nothing to maintain me but my wit; My Money is too little I'm sure. I cannot believe thy wit's more than thy Money, A fellow so well limbed, so able to do good service, And want. Why Mistress, my shoulders were not made for a Frock And a Basket, nor a Coal-sack neither, no nor My hands to turn a trencher at a table's side. I like that resolution well; but how comes it Then, that thy wit leaves thy body unfurnished? Thou art very poor? The fortune of the Dice you see. They are the only wizards, I confess, The only fortune-tellers; but he that goes to Seek his fortune from them, must never hope To have a good destiny allotted him: yet it is Not the course that I dislike in thee, but that Thou canst not supply that course, and out- Cross them that cross thee; Were I as thou art You'd be as beggarly as I am. I'll be hanged first. Nay, you must be well hanged ere you can be as I am. So Sir, I conceit you; were I as well hanged then As you could imagine, I would tell some rich widow Such a tale in her ear.
seed 43: T27 · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
No I'l stay awhile and tell 'm out with patience. I cannot hold a joynt still; Dost wispe me, thou atterdemallion; I'l doe your errands, if I have a Husband; Oh that I could spit Wild fire! My heart, Oh my heart! If it does not goe pantle, Pantle, pantle in my belly, I am no honest woman: But I'l doe your errands. Kinde Gentlewoman, you have some patience. I have too much Sir. You may doe a good office, and make your selfe a Peacefull moderator betwixt me and my angry Father, whom his wife hath mou'd to spleene Against me. Sir, I doe not disallow the kindenesse your Consanguinity renders, I would not teach You otherwise; I'd speake with your Vncle, Sir, If you'l give me leave. You may talke with me Sir, in the meane time. With me would you talke, Gentlewoman? Yes Sir, with you; you are a brave Vnthrift. Not very brave neither; yet I make a shift When you have a cleane shirt. I'l be no Pupill to a woman; leave your discipline. Nay, pray you heare me Sir, I cannot chide. I'l but give you good counsell; 'tis not a good Course that you n. Yet I must run to'th' end of it. I would teach you a better, if you'd stay where you are. I would stay where I am, if I had any money. In the dyeing house? I thinke so too, I have play'd at Passage all This while, now I'd go to Hazard. Dost thou want Money? Thou art worthy to be tatter'd Hast thou no wit now thy Money's gone? 'Tis all the portion I have; I have nothing to maintaine me but my it; My Money is too little I'm sure. I cannot beleeve thy wit's more than thy Money, A fellow so well limb'd, so able to doe good service, And want. Why Mistris, my shoulders were not made for a Froc And a Basket, nor a Coale-sacke neither, no nor My hands to turne a trencher at a tables side. I like that resolution well; but how comes it Then, that thy wit leaves thy body unfurnisht? Thou art very poore? The fortune of the Dice you see. They are the onely wizards, I confesse, The onely fortune-tellers; but he that goes to Seeke his fortune from them, must never hope To have a good destiny allotted him: yet it is Not the course that I dislike in thee, but that Thou canst not supply that course, and out- Crosse them that crosse thee; Were I as thou art You'd be as beggarly as I am. I'l be hang'd first. Nay, you must be well hang'd e'r you can be as I am. So Sir, I conceite you; were I as well hang'd then As you could imagine, I would tell some rich widow Such a tale in her eare.