Two Wise Men and All the Rest Fools · chunk 6 of 68
Anonymous · published 1619 · first performed or written 1619 [1613-1619] (Annals) satire; dialogue unassigned nearest T35 Fools, wit and railing · 515 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T35: fool, wit, aristippus, achilles, wise, fools, patroclus, thersites, master, men.
Thou mak'st a large offer, & a rash, which full soon (I doubt) thou wilt revoke: but i'll try thee. Before thou begin to profess this art, thou must forget all rules and instructions of manners taught thee by thy fathers, godfathers, or schoolmasters, and renounce all good counsel given thee from the beginning of the world to this day: that so being an empty and void vessel thou mayst be the more apt to receive the tincture and impression applied. And thus begin thy A.B.C. in Machiavelli's school. Otherwise; if thou shouldst reserve but so much as a secret intention to keep thine old honesty on the one side of thy head, and lay open the other side to entertain these restless and still stirring crotchets, there would be such hurly-burly in thy brain, that all the wit thou hast will not keep them in order. Therefore, if thou desirest to be of the cunning crew, and withal lov'st thine own peace, come clear without wit or honesty, we'll teach enough in a week to serve thee all thy life time. I'll bring thee acquainted, and then i'll turn him lose to teach and furnish thee with destructions enough for a whole country. Destructions. What should I do with them except it were to destroy others. But I doubt I shall pay dear for my schooling, and that I like not. But for the other point of parting with my former good lessons, faith, I can quickly do that for I never gained any thing by them, therefore I can be content to come to him as naked as ever I was born. That's great step to your well profiting I may say to you; and 'tis a great sign of grace to be obedient, and wholly to resign yourself to good inspirations: but canst thou tell when thou hast good counsel given thee? Not I; more than a child: For now you ha'made me put off all my old learning I am become a very innocent, as if I were this day taken from my mammy: but I trust you because you are my friend. I hope you'll put me to none, but such as shall teach me enough for my money. And you say he is wise and will give me samples enough, & then I warrant you I'll take 'em like a sponge till I be twice so big as I am. Well, then thus far we are agreed. And I wish you not to stand upon his getting by you, lest you be penny-wise, and pound foolish. How learned you his cunning so perfectly? have you known him long. O, I? why I have known him these 30 years at least, and conversed with him in his best times; somewhat it cost me you must think, but that's past. I would not for any thing but that I did known thoroughly. Has he been in Italy then as you said before? I that he has, and carried from thence more than all the towns in Italy could spare. what's that?
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Thou makst a large offer, & a rash, which full soone (I doubt) thou wilt revoke: but ile try thee. Before thou begin to professe this art, thou mt forget all rules and instructions of manners taught thee by thy fathers, godfathers, or schoolemasters, and renounce all good counsaile given thee from the beginning of the world to this day: that so being an empty ad voide vessell thou maist be the more apt to receiue the tincture and impression applyed. And thus begin thy A.B.C. in matchevillaines schoole. Otherwise; if tho shouldst reserue but so much as a secret intention to keepe thine old honesty on the one side of thy head, and lay open the tother side to entertaine these restlesse and still stirring cratchets, there would be such hurly burly in thy brain, that all the wit thou hast will not keepe them in order. Therefore, if thou desirest to be of the cunning cure▪ and withall lov'st thine own peace▪ come cleere without wit or honesty, weele teach enough in a weeke to serue thee all thy life time. Il bring thee acquainted, and then ile turne him loose to teach and furnih thee with destructions enough for a whole country. Destructions. What should I doe with them except it were to destroy others. But I doubt I shall pay deare for my schooling, and that I like not. But for the other point of parting with my former good lessons, faith, I can quickly doe that for I never gain'd any thing by them, therefore I can be content to come to him as naked as ever I was born. That's great step to your well profiting I may say to you; and tis a great signe of grace to be obedient, and wholly to resigne your selfe to good inspirations: but canst thou tell when thou hast good counsell giuen thee? Not I; more then a child: For now you haumade me put off all my old learning I am become a very innocent, as if I were this day taken from my mammee: but I trust you because you are my frend. I hope yule put me to none, but such as shall teach me enough for my mony. And you say he is wise and will giue me samples enough, & then I warrant you Ile take um like a spunge till I be twice so big as I am. Well, then thus farre we are agreed. And I wish you not to stand vpon his gettig by you, least you be pennywise, and pound foolish. How learn'd you his cunning so perfectly? hau you knowne him long. O, I why I haue knowne him these 30 yeares at least, and convers'd with him in his best times; somewhat cost me you must thinke, but that's past. I would not for any thing but that I did knowne throughly. Has he beene in Italy then as you said before? I that he has, and caried from thence more thn all the townes in Italy could spare. what's that?