Two Wise Men and All the Rest Fools · chunk 24 of 68
Anonymous · published 1619 · first performed or written 1619 [1613-1619] (Annals) satire; dialogue unassigned nearest T3 Sickness, physic and doctors · 492 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T3: doctor, master, cure, disease, pray, physic, physician, mr, sick, lady.
It is almost eleven. I doubt it be no more indeed. I am so sleepy still: go see if Monsieur Parvagracio be stirring. I am very melancholic this morning whatsoever I ail. I care not if I send for my Physician: or whether the cause be that I lost all my money yesternight, and now know not where to get more until I have conferred with my Agent for discommodities, nor where to dine scotfree in the mean time. Sir, he was asleep when I came to his chamber, but his page waked him. He remembers his love, and desires you to beat his chamber an hour hence, than his Barber comes, as he does every Sunday instead of prayers. He charged me to tell you that he hath an ounce of the most transcendent tobacco that ever crossed the salts, sent him by a Lady of his secret knowledge and yours, with whom you both must dine this day. The property of this tobacco is to yield a porringer full of Rheum every pipeful: and procure ventosity conveniently to descend very odoriferous, and secure from audibility. She reserves store of it for her own special use in times of necessity, as of attendance in Court, hearing of Plays, sitting at Cards, and the like. Further, that a little of it taken pill-fashion, will diffuse and disperse mixion, so that a Lady may abide in company forty eight hours, not disposed to evaporation. Besides he willed me to tell you, that this Lady yesterday hath received a book from a friend of hers that went over with Sir Robert Shirley into Persia, entitled de flatibus separandis ac dividendis, cosque emittendis; not forward at the face as gamers use to do in wars, but arere, as Jackanapes delivers squibs, written by a learned Physician doctorated by the magnificent order of the Mountebanks there, she will anon at dinner entreat you two to lay your heads together for translating this book into English. And where you find any sent worth the nosing, you will make stops upon it, and deliver your opinion by way of comment for the better undertaking the fence, with the particular causes and effects of every several and distinct fume produced thereby. And hereafter at better leisure she will have the subject of the whole book Anatomatized by her own Surgeon, and set forth in due proportion and colours, and give it a convenient room in her gallery. This is good news; shall we dine there? and snuff this dainty tobacco? that's excellent. here's a shilling to drink go too, 'tis no matter now: the next time I have a good hand a dice I'll give thee two shillings. Why now I feel myself well again. Go boy, tell my Physician he shall not need to come. Stay, I have not sent for him now I remember me. Have you done my business (Proberio) with the Knight and his son-in-law?
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
It is almost eleuen. I doubt it be no more indeed. I am so sleepie still: goe see if Monsieur Parvagracio be stirring. I am verie melancholicke this morning whatsoeuer I aile. I care not if I send for my Physician: or whether the cause be that I lost all my monie yesternight, and now know not where to get more vntill I haue conferred with my Agent for discommodities, nor whre to dine scot-free in the meane time. Sir, hee was asleepe when I came to his chamber, but his page wak'd him. He remembers his loue, and desires you to beat his chamber an houre hence, then his Barber comes, as he does everie sonday in steed of praiers. Hee charg'd mee to tell you that hee hath an ounce of the most transcendēt Tobaccho that ever cross'd the salts, sent him by a Ladie of his secret knowledge and yours, with whom you both must dine this day. The propertie of this Tobaccho is to yeeld a porringer full of Rheume everie pipefull: and procure ventositie conveniently to descend verie odoriferous, and secure from audibility. She reserues store of it for her owne speciall vse in times of necessitie, as of attendance in Court, hearing of Plaies, itting at Cards, and the like. Further, that a little of it taken pill-fashion, will diffuse and disperse mixion, so that a Ladie may abide in companie fortie eight houres, not disposed to evaporation. Besides he will'd me to tell you▪ that this Ladie yesterday hath receiued a booke from a friend of hers that went ouer with Sir Robrt Sherley ino Persia, entitled de flatibus separandis ac dividendis, cos que emittendis; not forward at the face as gamers vse to doe in warres, but aee, as Iacke-an-apes deliuers squibs, written by a learned Physician doctorated by the magnificent order of the Mountebankes there, she will anon at diner intreate you two to lay your heads together for translating this booke into English. And where you finde any sent worth the nothing▪ you will make stoppes vpon it, and deliuer your opinion by way of comment for the better vndertaking the fence, with the particular causes and effects of euery severall and distinct ume produced thereby. And hereafter at better leisure she will haue the subiect of the whole booke Anatomatized by her owne Surgeon, and set forth in due proportion and colors, and giue it a convenient roome in her gallerie. This is good newes; shall wee dine there? and snuffe this daintie Tobaccho? that's excellent. heere's a shilling to drinke goe too, 'tis no matter now: the next time I haue a good hand a dice Ile giue thee two shillings. Why now I feele my selfe well againe. Goe boy, tell my Physician he shall not neede to come. Stay, I haue not sent for him ow I remember me. Haue you done my businesse (Proberio) with the Knight and his sonne-in-law?