Two Wise Men and All the Rest Fools · chunk 49 of 68
Anonymous · published 1619 · first performed or written 1619 [1613-1619] (Annals) satire; dialogue unassigned nearest T6 Money, debt and credit · 509 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T6: money, master, pound, law, lawyer, chain, gentleman, gold, pay, pray.
So am I Sir, now I shall be quiet. An you marked Sir, I never entreated you for conscience sake to give her any thing, but for my trouble. Nay I have learned to stretch a conscience with any man since I came to you. And 'tis soon learned if a man will give his mind to it: for the good will of a jade is all. What a fool was I that began no sooner to study it? But I have more news to tell you Sir. As I came by the Chancery office I was called in to see a very foul bill, put in against you at M. Thompson's suit, for things which you did take (not altogether steal) out of his house. And for a lease 'parel he challengeth from you: and there are also your fourscore and ten caudles in a row: in every line a caudle, spiced and sweet, & as hot as ever they went down your throat: and some say they shall be still upon record in perpetuam rei memoriam, if it be true, it shall go hard but every morning in term times as long as I live I'll spend my penny at one of them. Hath he served me so? well. 'tis a maxim with me Simplo to be ashamed of nothing (as thou knowest) but yet I'll be even with him. He shall out of his house whatsoever it cost me. There is also another bill against you by your wives near cozen, wherein you are charged (not directly with stealing, but taking without the owner's privity or consent) a picture, a map, and other household stuff. I make no more reckoning of that imputation then of the rest. For if the worst fall I shall have them as they be praised. Nay, if you care not for the manner of taking them, the matter is not great otherwise. Not a rush Simplo, save and think what they will, I am sorry I took no more. But one thing made me laugh heartily, and in my conceit it was a witty trick that was told me lately, that you borrowed 100l of a gentlewoman called Mistress Ferrers Gratis, and put it out for 10 in the 100. And after a year and a half with much ado paid her: and so you got 15l handsomely. I would I could tell whereto borrow two or three 1000l in that sort. methinks I have wit enough to thrive on this fashion. 'tis a fine way indeed, and cleanly (so that a man look to his security) And comes in without stock of his own: a very beggar may grow rich thus: and every paltry knave may thrive so, if he take heed. Millers use this trick to lend a bushel of another man's corn ground into meal to be paid again in wheat, so he takes toll twice of one bushel, and no cost of his own, It is but making the first bushels owner stay so much the longer.
seed 43: unassigned · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
So am I Sir, now I shall bee quiet. An you mark'd Sir, I neuer intreated you for conscience sake to giue her anie thing, but for my trouble. Nay I haue learn'd to stretch a conscience with any man since I came to you. And tis soone learn'd if a man will giue his mind to it: for the good will of a jade all. What a foole was I that began no sooner to studie it But I haue mor newes to tell you Sir. As I came by the Chancerie office I was call'd in to see a rie foule bill, put in against you t M. Thompsos suit, for things which you did take (not altogether steale) out of his house. And for a lease parell hee challengeth from you: and there ae also your fourescore and ten cawdles in a rowe: in everie line a Cawdle, spic'd and sweet, & as hot as ever they went down your throat: and some saie they shall be still vpon record in perpetuam rei memoriam, if it bee true, it shal goe hard but evere morning in tearme times as long as I liue Ile spend my penie at one of them. Hath he seru'd me so? well. tis a maxime with mee Simplo to be asham'd of othing (as thou knowest) but yet Ile be even with him. He shall out of his house whatsoeuer it cost me. There is also another bill against you by your wiues neere cosen, wherein you are charged (not directly with stealing, but taking without the owners privitie or cō sent) a picture, a map, and other houshold stuffe. I make no more reckning of that imputation then of the rest. For if the worst fall I shall haue them as they bee praised. Nay, if you care not for the manner of taking thē, the matter is not great otherwise. Not a rush Simplo, sae and thinke what they will, I am sorie tooke no more. But one thing made me laugh hartelie, and in my conceit it was a wittie tricke that was told me latelie, that you borrowed 100 of a gentlewoman called Misris Ferers Gratis, and put it out for 10 in the 100. And after a yeare and a halfe with much ado paid her: and so you got 15 handsomelie. I would I could tell whereto borrow two or three 1000 in that sort. Me thinks I haue wit enough to thriue on this fashion. Tis a fine way indeed, and cleanelie (so that a m ̄ looke to his securitie) And comes in without stoce of his owne: a verie begger may grow rich thus: and everie paultrie knaue may thriue so, if he take heed. Millers vse this tricke to lend a bushell of another mans corne ground into meale to be paid againe in wheate, so he takes tole twice of one bushell, and no cost of his owne, It is but making the first ay so much the longer.