Two Wise Men and All the Rest Fools · chunk 53 of 68
Anonymous · published 1619 · first performed or written 1619 [1613-1619] (Annals) satire; dialogue T6 Money, debt and credit typicality 0.83 · 502 words
Marked words are the most distinguishing words of T6: money, master, pound, law, lawyer, chain, gentleman, gold, pay, pray.
Why sir, 'tis but your fancy. And now you cannot go back: here is witness enough you engaged your honour to have it. take the less and save your reputation. I did so indeed, the more fool I to pass my word before I felt their stink. I cannot abide to think on them. But to save my credit go to, dispatch. I'll have the whole 100l since I must have some. I'll never give my bond for a little. Well sir, it shall be done. Now boy, was not this well handled? I must have had them upon any terms: but he never perceived it. Didst thou mark how he entreated me with respective terms, and pinned the bargain upon me? Those be always the best penniworths. It is a goodly thing to be wise. Remember boy when thou comest to years, to take this course of thriving. Indeed Sir you carried this business admirably to the end. I would rather than 40l for my mind sake my old master your worship's father had stood in a corner, and had heard, and observed his sons wisdom. I warrant it had been worth 1000l to somebody. Well. Now we want nothing for getting this threescore pound but Parvagracio to seal. Go seek him out, and we'll be merry. I go fetch him. I think the air is infected, that such contagious caterpillars swarm abroad in this age to destroy youth, that scarce one fruit among 100 comes to be ripe but is first rotten. Such as this broker is are nourished by the Devil for no cause but to waste young men in old prisons. And these cormorants which set them a-work to entice youth to these pestilent adventures methinks they can have no hope that he which receives so little money upon great bonds, doth ever mean to pay them. For he deals not with one of these gripers, but with as many as he can find willbe content with his own security. Therefore when he comes to be arrested he is buried alive for all, and payeth none. I wish they were all so served. then the loss of the money on the one side, and the sharp rod of imprisonment on the other side, would bring both sorts to repentance, & bethink themselves of using a good conscience to deceive on neither part. But if your Chancellor hold on his course in allowing the extortioner no more but the bare money made of such commodities that will shortly end the abuse. For this Aesop's dog will learn to hold the next piece better, than to be deluded with a shadow of double gain. Take heed to my horses, that they be well walked stuffed and dressed. I warrant you Sir, and your Worship may have provender of all sorts. Will it please you to see your chamber? Yes. but I must have the best in the house. You shall Sir. What wilt please your worship to have to supper?
nodes 639–652 (positions in the processed text, not lines of the printed book) · chunk 53 of 68 in this edition
Length
502 words · 623 tokens
Topic (seed 42)
T6 — Money, debt and creditcross-work theme (confirmed, in the genre comparison) · typicality 0.830 (cosine to the topic centroid)
Other seeds
seed 43: T9 · seed 44: T10 — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
Why sir, tis but your fancie. And now you cannot goe backe: here is witnesse enough you engaged your honour to haue it. take the lesse and saue your reputation. I did so indeed, the more foole I to passe my word before I felt their stinke. I cannot abide to thinke on them. But to saue my credit goe to, dispatch. Ile haue the whole 100l since I must haue some. Ile never giue my bond for little. VVell sir, it shall be done. Now boy, was not this well handled? I must haue had them vpon any tearmes: but hee never perceiued it. Didst thou marke how ee intreated mee with respectiue tearmes, and pinn'd the bargaine vpon me? Those bee alwayes the best penie-worths. It is a goodly thing to bee wise. Remember boy when thou comest to yeeres, to take this course o thriing. Indeed Sir you carried this businesse admirabli the end. I would rather then 40l for my minde sake my old master your Worships father had stod in a corner, and had heard, and obserued his sonnes wisdome. I warrant it had beene worth 1000l to some bodie. Well. Now wee want nothing for getting this▪ theescore pound but Paragracio to seale. Goe eeke him out, and weele be merrie. I goe fetch him. I thinke the aire is infected, that such contagious caterpillers swarme abroad in this age to destroy vouth, that scarse one fruite among 100 comes to bee ripe but is first rotten. Such as this broker is are nourished by the Divel for no cause but to waste yong men in old prisons. And these cormorants which set them a-worke to entise youth to these pestilent adventures me thinkes they can haue no hope that he which receives so litle monie vpon great bonds, doth euer meane to pay them. For he deales not with one of these gripers, but with as many as he can find wilbe content with his owne securitie. Therefore when he comes to bee arrested he is buried aliue for all, and payeth none. I wish they were all so serued. then the losse of the monie on the one side, and the sharpe rod of imprisonment on the other side, would bring both sorts to repentance, bethinke themselues of vsing good conscience to deceiue on neither part. But if your Chauncellour hold on his course i allowing the extortioner no more but the bare monie made of such commodities that will shortlie end the abuse. For this Eops dog will learne to hold the next piece better▪ then to be deluded with a shadow of double gane. Take heed to my horses▪ that they bee well walked stuffed and dressed. I warrant you Sir, and your Worship may haue provender of all sorts. Will it please you to see your chamber? Yes▪ but I must haue the best in the house. You shall Sir. What wilt please your worship to haue to suppe?