Marked words are the most distinguishing words of the nearest topic T16: lady, madam, gentleman, lordship, ladies, honour, mistress, sweet, court, servant.
It was not the newest fashion the last year, and no Chronicle make▪ mention of it. Therefore if any man had written. Nihil factum est quod non fuit factum prius. I would have given his Proverbs the lie. For this saffroning was never used but in Ireland for bodily linen, to dissipate the company of creepers. And for such torturing of these Iceland Imps, with eradicating their fleeces, thereby to enjoy the roots, which best will abide the basting, it hath need to be new, for it is noisome, and makes your periwig nothing handsome. Sir, let it suffice you that it is the newest fashion this very day. And if the sight and smell of it offend your nose, you know the ordinary remedy is to remove your nose. Yet I suppose by your paleness you use to take tobacco, than which, nothing is more fulsome. Indeed, I want colour in my face, and wish I had the art to get so rosy a cheek as you have. You do but guess that I use art to give grace to my feature, so it is easy for you to be deceived: but I will tell you a certain rule to know if any woman be painted. Let me be beholding to you for this cunning infallible. If you suspect it, take a pin, and scratch her cheek pretty deep to the bone, and if it bleed not, assure yourself she is painted. I see now you are disposed to be pleasant with me. I bear all kindly. Now I entreat you to proceed with publishing my other faults, that when I know them all, I may amend, and so appear perfect in your sight. Secondly, I charge you with flattery, at every word calling me Lady: which you are very sure I am not, seeing me come hither on my own feet, whereas if I were a Lady I must of necessity be at my caroche with 4 horses, or else my honour is in the dust in summer, and in the mire in winter. This then is an unexcusable sin of yours. Alas. what should I call you not knowing your name? And you of all the women that ever I knew are angry for giving you more than your due. But rather than I will displease you that way, I will devise some other Epitheton of courtesy, until you determine to take Ladyship upon you, so well as it would become you. Nay, I would not have you think that I am exceedingly angry for mistaking my present condition. It was a fault, but very venial. Your other errors I will conceal for this time, as unwilling to oppress you with penance, sithence I find you so freely to offer satisfaction. Then now vouchsafe to receive me into your service, sithence no man shall carry himself more dutifully.
seed 43: T5 · seed 44: unassigned — topic numbers are assigned independently in each run; equal or different numbers say nothing by themselves
Original spelling (EEBO-TCP, unregularized)
It was not the newest fashion the last yeare, and no Cronicle make▪ mention of . Therefore if any man had written. Nihil factum est quod non fuit factum prius. I would haue giuen his Proverbs the lye. For this saffroning was never vs'd but in Ireland for bodily linnen, to dissipate the companie of creepers. And for such torturing of these Izeland Impes, with radicating their fleeces, therby to enioy the roots, which best will abide the basting, it hath need to be new, for it is noy some, and makes your pretywig nohing handsome. Sir, let it suffise you that it is the newest fashion this verie day. And if the sight and smell of it offend your nose, you know the ordinary remedie is to remoue your nose. Yet I suppose by your palenesse you vse to take Tabaccho, then which, nothing is more fulsome. Indeed, I want colour in my face, and wishe I had the art to get so rosie a cheeke as you haue. You doe but guesse that I vse art to giue grace to y feature, so it is easie for you to be deceiued: but I will tell you a certaine rule to know if anie woman be painted. Let me bee beholding to you for this cunning infallible. If you suspect it, take a pin, and scratch her cheeke pretie deepe to the bone, and if it bed not, assure your selfe she is painted. I see now you are dispos'd to be pleasant with me. I beare all kindly. Now I intreate you to proceede with publishing my other faults, that when I know them all, I may amend, and so appeare perfect in your sight. Secondly, I charge you with flatterie, at every word calling me Ladie: which you are verie sure I am not, seeing me come hither on my owne feet, whereas if I were a Lady I must of necessitie be at my Caroach with 4 horses, or els my honour is in the dust in sommer, and in the mire in winter. This then is an vnexcusable sinne of yours. Alas. what should I call you not knowing your name? And you of all the women that euer I knew are angrie for giuing you more then your due. But rather then I will displease you that way, I will devise some other Epitheton of curtesie, vntill you determine to take Ladyship vpon you, so well as it would become you. Nay, I would not haue you thinke that I am exceedingly angrie for mistaking my present condition. It was a fault, but verie veniall. Your other errours I will conceale for this time, as vnwilling to oppresse you with penance, sithence I finde you so freely to offer satisfaction. Then now vouchsafe to receiue me into your service, sithence no man shall carie himselfe more dutifully.